Friends, Family & Me
I recently did a couple of episodes on Coffee, Wine & Chocolate podcast regarding the importance of friends, and then on family. In the last, I would say, six to seven years I have learned more about myself and those around me. I have accepted my flaws and my negatives because the other parts of me outweigh them and it is just a part of me. Everyone has good and bad sides to them. There is no way to be perfect, so we have to love ourselves for who we are and always work on being better and do better every day.
I have realized in my learning that friends and family are so important. Much more than I ever thought. I am ashamed to say it, but, I was so bad about keeping up with friends and family after I was married and started a family of my own. When going through my separation and divorce, it really hit me. I found out that I didn’t help myself by being available for some and doing things for them that were not appreciated and much worse, were just expected. I did not know about boundaries, how important they are, and that they help relationships be stronger and help with communication, respect and understanding.
So, I am building better relationships now with those I love. I am honest to a fault, at times to the point of probably saying more than I should, but that is who I am. Sometimes I am so honest that I over say or think things which just gets me into trouble by sounding like I don’t know what I am saying. Do you know what I mean? I then get frustrated at myself and my silly emotions take over. Because, once again, that is who I am.
Friends
I have quality friends that I appreciate and try to keep in touch with as much as possible. Some not as often as others, but it is like we just get it. The friends I have made over the years I have mostly lost touch with. We keep up with each other through social media and that is about it. The friends I made in the last five to seven years are very special to me. Mainly because they were with me through my hardest times and my changing in so many ways. They were my support and ones I could go to when I needed a break from my crazy life (as I saw it). I am blessed to have the friends I have.
Family
Then, let’s talk about family. Family is so important to me. While going through my separation and divorce I was with my parents a lot. We went through a lot together during this time. I was finding myself again, trying to understand all I was going through and not making it easy on my parents that were trying to help me through things. There were also my boys. I am sure I have said this before, but, I put up this wall between me and my boys because I was protecting myself and them from more hurt. But I found out later it was just causing more hurt. I did it so that I would not pull them into what their dad and I were going through. I was not going to put him in a bad light with them and I was not going to pretend everything was okay.
I realized too late that it was not the right thing to do. But now we are working on our communication and staying in touch. Not as much as I would like, but they are busy with their own families and lives.
So, my overall point and all I want to share is, to not put family and friends aside. Make sure you stay in touch regularly. Friends can help us daily, just as family. And family members are so important to stay close to. Yes, there are some that you don’t need to stay in touch with for your own sanity, but the rest are so important!
Love you all and stay blessed!
Belle xo
