Positivity

I Am Amazed

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*Pixabay

I know I haven’t been here a while and I don’t normally go on a rant about things, but I have to say I am very disappointed. 

I am disappointed in some people, things I am seeing and reading right now. 

I see this world going through some very hard times.  I see people struggling to get by because they had to be let go or laid off from their work because businesses had to close to protect themselves and the people around them.  I see people getting sick and struggling to hold on to their lives through the doctors and nurses that have to be there through it all.  I see families worried and scared because friends and family members are in hospitals where they can’t get to them to support them because they cannot go in for their own protection.  I see “essential workers” having to be out there putting themselves in the midst of possibly getting this virus just to get people things they need or to protect people.

And yet…there are people complaining that they are bored having to stay home.  There are people searching social media and jumping on other people’s pages and posts being negative and bashing others.  I see and hear people being negative and disrespectful of others.  Not thinking that someone may be going through something more.  Possibly depression, possibly sadness, possibly loss, possibly anxiety….who knows! Some people are so self-absorbed and judgmental of others, they don’t think about what they say or how they say it might affect someone.  Heaven forbid someone to be empathetic and put themselves in another person’s place for just a few moments. To think about what that person might be going through before opening their mouths or saying something!

I understand, by what I have learned growing up and I have learned through life, that it is not for us to judge others, nor to put our thoughts, feelings or beliefs on others.  This is a world of free will.  Yes, you can say what you want because we all have a right to say anything.  But please, don’t be so blinded in your own self that you don’t look to see what is around you, what someone else might be going through or what someone else might need.

At this time when the world is going through so much, we need positivity.  We need understanding in each other.  We need support, helping others and bringing a little joy to this madness we are going through right now.  Stop and think before you react to something or someone.

Please, if you can, look around you.  See what you can do to help.  Help by volunteering to get groceries for a neighbor, help by showing someone on one of the social media platforms that you appreciate them and are there if they need to talk.  Show others that this world does have positive special people still and that there is hope for our future.

Show that all races, all nationalities, all ethnicities, all genders can work together and support each other instead of trying to bring upheaval to all that is going on right now.  Instead of trying to shame others for who or what they are.  Instead of “taking sides”, just work together. If you feel you have been misrepresented or shamed for who you are or what you believe or do, why would you not think about that before doing the same thing to someone else?  I have seen so much of this lately and it saddens me.

No one is perfect but we are all perfectly different in our own way.  We will not be like anyone else because, as a wise person has told me, “if we were all the same, what a boring world this would be.”

I know we can do better folks. I have seen it.  This world amazes me every day when I see the beauty around me.  When I see caring helpful souls that are there for others.  It only takes a little bit of your time in a day to give a helping hand, ear or words.  It makes such a big difference, not only in that other person’s life but also in yours.

Belle xo

Me, writing, topics, sharing

Continue to Learn and Be Enlightened

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*Photo from Pixabay

I have not felt like writing very much recently.  Mainly because no matter what I do, I am constantly being watched for what I write.  And if by any chance I say something “wrong” (even with hardly any followers on my blog) an alarm goes out and I am shut down again.

I started this blog to be able first to share things, like a journal, and not affect anyone, and yet get thoughts out of my head, get support, and show others possibly going through the same thing that they are not alone.  Second to be able to write poems and stories, etc, and let my creative side spill out and not be held inside.  And yet, here it is being held in again because of this.

I have reached a place in my life where I am finding the real me, understanding some things I didn’t before and feeling more myself than I have in such a very long time.  I have found that I am an extremely sensitive person of which I thought meant I was needy and over the top.  Now I understand it just means that I have a gift for feeling things from others around me in which makes me extra empathetic.  Now I understand why I could always put myself in other people’s shoes and feel what they felt and understood their side of things better than most.  And why my emotions sometimes were all over the place when in certain situations. And also why I needed and enjoyed being by myself.

It also explained why I felt the need to help those around me and take on their problems when they were not mine to take on.  Why I don’t like chaos and want everyone happy around me, so I tried all ways to make those around me happy, even if it meant I was not happy.  But I thought I was happy because others around me were.

Understanding these things has put more confidence in me to the point I feel my fire coming back.  The light inside of me is growing strong again.  I still cringe when someone I love is not happy.  But I understand more now, that I have to be happy too and my life has to be lived separately as well as with the ones I love.  So that we are all happy in our own way.

Anyway friends, I just wanted to share these things and I am finding my voice again and my confidence in my writing and love of creativity.  Hopefully, because of this, I will have some things to share very soon.

Until then, stay well.  Keep an open mind and keep learning in life and in you.

Belle xo

Weird dreams and thoughts

Blood Rain

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*Above From Pixabay

You know those intense dreams? The ones that feel so real yet you know it can’t be?

One I had a few nights ago:

Friends are going to a dirt bike race they are participating in.  I am busy so decline going.  It is a night time race.  As I am walking down the street, after talking to a few and seeing more pass by from the track, I hear the fireworks going off.   I look down and I see a place where I must have scratched a small scab off of my hand and made it bleed.  But then there is another.  And then more.  I realize suddenly that it is not from me! The sky is raining blood! I run and seek shelter, but see none.  Suddenly I come upon a bleacher and it is covered for sun shade during the day.  I race under the cover and stand as far away from all sides as I can.  I am breathless and don’t know what to do.  I look around for help and some insight as what to do.

Then I am awake, hot and sweaty.  Well, that was something.  What the hell???

Yep.  Very weird!

Belle

Thankful

Here We Are

I have a very special person in my life.  He has been by my side and supported me through so much, as I have tried to do for him as well (although I think he can say he has dealt with more 😉 ).  He has taken a place in my heart and there he stays.

Have you ever found someone you just click with.  The one that understands you more than you understand yourself?  The one that can tell you what you are thinking next before you think it?  The person that can tell something is wrong even before you realize it?  I have found that person.  I am blessed to have him in my life.

When I went to see him at the end of October, it was like I had just seen him, yet it felt like it had been forever! You know what I mean?

When he visited me last, he was going through the loss of his mother, the one person that had always been there, had looked after him and in turn, he looked after her until her passing.  I cannot imagine and don’t want to imagine.  I know it will come one day and I am not wanting it to.  My parents mean so much to me!

But during this time, he was lost.  He knew where he was, but he was numb to all around him.  He was not himself and all I could do was be there for him, as he has always been there for me.  As a matter of fact, just today he told me he didn’t realize how out of it he had been during that time.  From what I understand that is normal and it can definitely be worse.

So, when I saw him in October, he was getting back to himself.  We went to see his personal assistant get married at a quaint farm where they were using the barns as entertainment/wedding venues.  We went and saw friends in London and went over to Rotterdam for a few days to see friends.  As I said, I am blessed.  The scenery in Rotterdam was amazing and beautiful depending on where you went.  (I am sharing a few pictures I took at the top of the page.)

He is now here visiting for a couple of weeks and is more himself than even when I went there to see him.  I am so happy about that.  I am trying to make sure he sees things he hasn’t yet and is enjoying himself while he is here.  We have so much fun together!

Anyway, I just wanted to share a bit about him and hopefully if he reads this he will see and know how much I appreciate him and I thank him for being there and always having my back, supporting me through it all!

 

Update

And So We Move On

620560A3-109A-4AD0-B0E0-302B023BFC27With all the traveling, holidays and weddings taking up my time, I did not get over 7000 words done in the NaNoWriMo.  However, that is 7000 more than I had and has me at a good start to my Fantasy novel! 🙂

So, we move on.  I am back and my plan is to be here weekly.  I hope everyone had a wonderful Thanksgiving Holiday here in the US or where ever you may be! I’m looking forward to seeing what everyone is doing during this month of December, wherever you are.

I have goals and plans that I am working on for the coming year and beyond.  I know many of you do as well.

Therefore, let’s make it all happen and get excited for all the plans ahead!!

Belle xo

(*Pic I took in Rotterdam)

 

NaNoWriMo

#NaNoWriMo

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*Pixabay

I have not been around recently for many reasons.  The main one is that I was preparing and beginning to participate in the #NaNoWriMo challenge! I was at the beginning of writing a fantasy novel and wanted that extra incentive to get it done or at least on the road to being done.  Knowing that you don’t always reach the finality of the book in this challenge, I knew I could at least get that push and “umph” to get it going and hopefully almost if not completely written by the end of November!!

Because of other things going on at the end of October and the beginning of this month I am now really going to be ducking into my writer’s cave and diving into my writing.  50,000 words by the end of November is no small feat so wish me luck and keep on being great the way you are!!!

Belle xo

Mental Health

Love You and Your Body

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*Pixabay

I have always had a love/hate relationship with my body.  But I have found that if I do not like something about my body I either need to live with it and love it, or do something about it and love it more.  That is why I am working with my doctor right now on a diet plan where I have a monthly check up for her to keep tabs on me.  And as I do this, I am exercising, going to yoga and eating a healthy diet (for the main part). I feel so great right now for doing this.

So, when I have a lady come in to our store, as she is going to be a model for us at the local fashion show we are participating in, and she is constantly down on herself; the way she looks, her body and her age, I try my best to make her feel good and confident about herself.  It hurts me to hear someone put themselves down and make rude comments about themselves.  It just isn’t right.  I just wanted her to feel good in her own skin!

Tonight was the fashion show and she looked great along with the other 10 models we had.  She being the oldest, she looked amazing and they all did so great!

How do you feel about your body?

Belle xo

 

Me, writing, topics, sharing, Update

Things I Have Done and Things In The Works

*Pixabay

I would like to share with you, dear readers, some things I have done and am working on.  I have had so much going on in my life for the past few years and have found again my love of writing in the midst of this.  So that, along with my love of singing and using my voice, I have decided on a lot of avenues to be able to do with these things I love.  Here goes….

*You know (or maybe you don’t), I wrote a book about erotica, mystery, adventure and love.  It helped me escape from things I was trying to deal with in my life at the time as well as help me to express myself in a different way.  I let the story pour out of me and take on a life of its own.  I am proud of that book.  I know that some of my family and friends do not approve of it nor of some of the things in it, but that’s okay.  They do not have to read it nor accept it.  And I am going through it now to correct errors and edit it a bit more, so I will be reintroducing it once that is done.  I am also going to start writing a second book with some of the same characters in it.  I feel, even if it never goes far, at least I tried.

*I am also writing a couple of other stories and am hoping they do well also, especially one of them.  These will be under the name I use here, Belle Scribe.  I enjoy the twist and turns you can make in a story and its fun to see where the story can go.  I am really excited!

*I have written short stories and poems that I am thinking of making into books of each.  I have so many of these, and I see others doing the same, as in putting them in a book together.  I think it is a great idea and am looking more into this.  We will see.

*Last but definitely not least, I am working on doing some audio work.  I have not been able to use my voice as much as I like, not having a full-on band to play with recently, other than on Sunday mornings.  So, I thought, what can I do to use my voice and share it with the world?  Audio work!  (Like audio book work, voice over, reading short stories for myself and others)  And now my small audio studio is set and ready to go.  I have done a couple of test readings and so far they are good.  I will be putting some audio to the stories here and hope you all will give me some good feed back once I do.  It would be very much appreciated, if so.  🙂

I have been listening to a lot of great podcasts recently regarding entrepreneurship, writing and audio, so am very excited to put things into practice and get started from here! And if you need someone to read your stories or help out, please let me know!

Belle xo

Uncategorized

I Am What I Am

I saw someone on twitter share that this song is a great one to play and sing along to. I found it and absolutely agree. So, I am sharing the video and the lyrics for you to enjoy too!

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I am what I am
I am my own special creation
So come take a look
Give me the hook or the ovation

It’s my world that I want to have a little pride in
My world and it’s not a place I have to hide in
Life’s not worth a damn till you can say
Hey world I am what I am
I am what I am
I don’t want praise
I don’t want pity
I bang my own drum
Some think it’s noise
I think it’s pretty
And so what if I love each feather and each spangle
Why not try and see things from a different angle
Your life is a sham till you can say
Hey world I am what I am
I am what I am
And what I am needs no excuses
I deal my own deck
Sometimes the ace
Sometimes the deuces
It’s my life and there’s no return and no deposit
One life, so it’s time to open up your closet
Life’s not worth a damn till you can say
Hey world I am what I am